So I'm losing things. I'm losing people. I'm losing myself. I lost my job a couple of years ago, because I stopped turning up after collapsing from overdoses on more than one occasion, whilst at work (unbeknownst to my colleagues), and my anxiety became too much. They rang me, texted me, and finally, sent me … Continue reading I want to care
I used to skip Uni to stay and do nothing, I used to skip appointments and deadlines and call in sick to work to do nothing. I quit work- to do nothing. The more time I've spent doing so, the more I've become bored with it. My best friend recently got a letter getting him … Continue reading Doing nothing is not satisfying.
Look, if you wanna make your new years eve wondering what amazing things you can do next year (now this year), do it. I'm not being sarcastic. I was once somebody who spent ages writing new years resolutions and I prayed to God to be a better person and respect life and Him more, it … Continue reading New year, same old me
So on my past post I spoke about the fact that I had just not turned up to work, and when asked, made a stupid excuse about not realising I was in. I don't know whether to feel relieved or guilty that they were nice to me. The woman on the phone said it was … Continue reading I actually attended work this time
I feel awful. I feel great. However juxtaposed that is, it's true. I feel awful. Today I missed work. I didn't call them, I actually turned my phone off. This is something the old me would have done. On Tuesday my sister called in sick to work, and that day I really didn't want to … Continue reading I skipped work again today
At University I remember collapsing when going to get some water. I'd taken a mix of benzos and some painkillers. I always took benzos at uni because otherwise my hands shook, I stumbled on my words, I felt like I couldn't face it without being numb. The first aid man came and took me to … Continue reading Another drug story- University
I went on a family trip altogether and it was just me, my Mum, my Dad, my Sister, my Nan, my Grandad, annnnd my drugs. Codeine, mainly. It was a beautiful house, right by the sea and in a nice little town with nice pubs and a lighthouse in the distance. I loved it. Especially … Continue reading A drug story